To carry you through the weekend…
Achieving your dream life doesn’t just take smarts or ambition. It requires only eight traits. Think of them as your happiness list, and use it to get more out of life.
Everyone wants to be happy. And successful. Trouble is, happiness and success are so amorphous, so hard to define, that it can be tough to know how to make them happen. But what if you could focus on doing a few easy things that would let you be the best, most upbeat version of you?
Your life is about to get better, happier and more fulfilling than ever.
SELF-CONTROL
What it is: Doing what’s in line with your most fundamental goals, even when you’re tempted to stray.
Why it matters: Self-control pushes you to make the difficult choice (go to the gym) over the immediately appealing option (sleep) for a result that will eventually pay off (a better bod). College students who scored high on self-control not only earned better grades but also were less depressed and anxious, had stronger personal bonds and hardier self-esteem, and had fewer struggles with food, the Journal of Personality notes.
GRIT
What it is: The raw endurance, perseverance and passion that keep you going despite obstacles.
Why it matters: Realizing big dreams takes work. When researchers at the University of Pennsylvania asked people in various fields, from banking to art, to describe star performers, grit came up over and over. (It’s also closely linked with a higher college GPA.) Being gritty isn’t always fun. Says Peterson, professor of psychology at the University of Michigan in Ann Arbor: “It can mean working 24/7 if that’s what it takes.” That’s why grit requires passion. It’s easier to plug away at a goal if you’re fired up.
CURIOSITY
What it is: A penchant for seeking out the new and different.
Why it matters: People who describe themselves as intentionally curious report greater life satisfaction and a deeper sense of meaning. They’re also apt to push themselves to learn and meet their goals, Motivation and Emotion reports. Curious folks are also better problem solvers. “If you cast about for diverse solutions, you’re less liable to go with the first thing you come up with,” says Todd Kashdan, Ph.D., author of Curious? That’s good, because if you focus solely on finding the right answer, you’ll miss a chance to hit on something truly original. At the least, you’ll have fun exploring kooky ideas and have amazing conversations along the way.
OPTIMISM
What it is: Believing that the best may lie ahead.
Why it matters: If you have faith that good things are likely to happen, you may be more open to opportunities when they arise. Research from Duke University found that optimistic MBA grads got jobs faster, despite being pickier. “When you think you’ve got a shot, it makes sense that you’ll prep more and come across as more confident. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy,” adds Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., author of The How of Happiness. Optimists also tend to see setbacks as temporary rather than as a sweeping negative judgment on their abilities—which makes it easier to persevere.
LOVE
What it is: Close, caring relationships where the good vibes flow both ways.
Why it matters: Love makes it easier to get through tough times and reach your peak potential. According to the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, when people were standing next to a friend, they perceived a hill as less steep than did those who were alone, and the longer they had known the friend, the less steep the hill seemed. Even cooler, merely thinking of ways a loved one had supported them had the same effect.
SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE
What it is: Your gray-dar—how well you pick up on the gray areas of a situation and intuit the things that people don’t say out loud.
Why it matters: When you’re dealing with tricky office politics, navigating a tense family dinner or trying to decode any interaction in which someone isn’t expressing exactly what she means, being able to read people and situations accurately will win you allies and make everyday encounters a lot more fun.
GRATEFULNESS
What it is: Fully appreciating and noticing the good in yourself, other people and the world at large, then giving that appreciation back in spades.
Why it matters: We all say thank you countless times a day, usually automatically. “But when you express true gratitude, you motivate others to be generous, which we know produces joy,” says Robert Emmons, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of California in Davis. And unlike self-control or grit, which tends to require a goal, gratitude can exist on its own: “You can be grateful to be alive,” Emmons says. The rest is gravy.
ZEST
What it is: Tackling life with energy, excitement, enthusiasm and eagerness.
Why it matters: People filled with positive energy tend to see their work as a calling—and end up more satisfied with what they do and with life in general, the Journal of Organizational Behavior reports.
